A Day of Firsts

About a week ago I experienced two "firsts" in one day-one good and one not so good. I was sitting in my office when one of my students who had not come for a while came in and sat down. A few weeks before she had skipped out on her class and disappeared until after our program was over. When I tried to confront her about it she ignored me and when I tried to pull her aside to speak with her she jerked out of her book bag and stormed off. When I chased after her to see what was wrong she broke down and told me to leave her alone so she could go home. This was not like her. She was really upset. She finally let another staff member sit down with her to talk and she cried her eyes out- stuff at home is really rough. She stopped coming to the program for a few weeks until this particular day. She walked in, sat down and said, "I want to apologize for how I acted towards you. I shouldn't have done that and I am sorry." I have worked with these students for 2 years and 1. I have never had a student admit that they did anything wrong and 2. I have never had a student apologize. That was a shining moment for me; a light in a sometimes dark world. It gave me hope, but what happened later that day cast a dark shadow over that hope and it was my second "first."

I had a confrontation with an angry parent, whose only agenda was to let me know how she felt about everything my staff and I had done wrong. She did not want to talk or discuss issues that were for the benefit of her daughter. She did not give me a chance to speak. She was angry and she came to let me know it and leave. I was somewhat dumbfounded. I often wonder why students are the way that they are and why the so poorly handle conflict and then I am enlightened by an experience like that. We teach our students to lay aside the fighting and the arguing and handle conflict in a more productive way, but we